Raise your hand if you’ve watched, and enjoyed, porn…*raises hand*
I recently read a book called Snuff by Chuck Palahnuik. For those who haven’t read a book by Palahnuik, do so soon! He is not only hilarious, but the research he puts into his historical elements parallels the wealth of bizarre American history in a Dan Brown book, which happens to be the only redeeming thing about Dan Brown books. Anyway, back to the point. Snuff is about a washed up porn star who is trying to end her career by breaking the record for the number of sex acts performed in a row (according to the definition this is a finger in vagina, hand on penis, mouth on penis or vagina, or penis in vagina for at least one minute) . This film is going to make millions and millions of dollars which will go to her lost child that no one really knows exists, except in myth. Read on…
I’ve been thinking a whole lot about the differences between men and women lately. I think it’s because I’m just so curious. There’s a little devil on my shoulder that wonders what exactly a beautiful girl is thinking when she walks past and me and I’m having a mini psychotic breakdown, lusting after her so colossally that I want to vomit.
That movie ‘What Women Want’ (although I’ve never had the pleasure of viewing it) is about looking into the mind of a woman. I guess I should just come right out and say that I think that is the worst idea for a movie ever. Not only would it be extraordinarily overwhelming to know exactly what all the women around you were thinking but it wouldn’t really be beneficial either. I also think in my own particular case, it would be a giant turn off because if all the women that I lust after were doing the same in return I think I’d be slightly repulsed.
As I walked out of work today, thinking about a new Mrs. Fantasy as usual, I started making a list of things that really define the sexual differences between men and women (beyond the obvious vagina/penis and emotional/suppressed comparisons). This is a work in progress and I almost didn’t post it because I know how endless this kind of brainstorm can be. On the other hand, I’ve been thinking about this for about ten years now so I figured it was time to unveil it on the eve of it’s first decade. I realize that these are gross generalizations so please keep your fiery comments (both internal and external) at bay. I also am making absolutely no judgments whatsoever about these differences. I have chosen to present them so that you can do the judging yourself.
“The only reason why you’d be in a relationship is so that you can have sex all day.” – Men
by Simon on March 26, 2009
This is a follow up to the entry entitled “Who The Hell IS This Guy??” in which I described something we all experience: you can’t remember what you were thinking when you made a bad decision. I finished by making a few comments about how friends are supposed to be there to support us but they often have trouble putting themselves in somebody else’s shoes (another thing we’ve all experienced.) This is my final dance about supportive and destructive friends.
When you fuck up in a relationship everyone knows it, including yourself, which is actually the hardest thing to face. However, like a good parent or responsible adult, your friends are typically there for you. They’re not there to hold you accountable for your actions or to make you feel dejected about what you’ve done wrong. (Depending on the relationship, that role is often given to your lover, unfortunately.)
Get schooled on how you can help your friends in relationship hell……
by Simon on March 17, 2009
The other day I was in an elevator when two women entered, and stood next to me. One was probably in her mid 40’s, about 5′7”, with dark skin, maybe Mexican. The other was about 5′2” and of Asian decent, my most educated guess being Korean, and she was about 25, or so, I would imagine. Anyway, they were talking about the older woman’s daughter who is freshman in high school and was on the varsity soccer team. The girl apparently said to her mom, “Everyone on the soccer team has a boyfriend but me.” The mom was explaining to the younger girl that her daughter didn’t actually care though because she was happy with no boyfriend. Besides her father said she couldn’t date until after college. I wonder if her dad is familiar with current dorm room policy?
by Cole on March 12, 2009
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